Our Father who AREN'T in heaven...

I always thought humans enjoyed having something to believe in and enjoyed surrounding themselves with positivity and people that put their life on the brighter side. I pondered; Mr. Brightside wouldn’t be most people’s go to karaoke song, if we didn’t always want to look on the Brightside of life, right?

Had I been living a lie? Had Mr. Brightside not been everyone’s favourite karaoke song to sing? Also, (probably more of an erudite discussion), was I the only one that enjoyed having something to believe in?

All this profound questioning led me to think, I can’t be the only one that enjoyed surrounding myself with positivity and like-minded people that have similar beliefs, so where did I get all of my personal principles from?

Neither of my parents are Catholic, however I was put into both a Catholic primary and secondary school. I remember being 8 years old and preparing to take my first communion. You had to go to every Sunday service for four or five weeks to understand what happens on communion night and to show your commitment to the parish. I hated going. Mum would go with me and even though she wasn’t Catholic, she actually almost enjoyed going. I never understood why. From my 8-year-old perspective I was having fomo, missing out on being at home for breakfast where my sister and dad were making Sunday morning banana pancakes. But for some reason, a person who isn’t even Catholic, didn’t mind missing out on the pancakes like I did. Which can you even believe? Imagine not being mad about missing pancakes…

When I questioned to mum why I had to go to church every Sunday in my whining voice, I also questioned why my mum enjoyed going to the church of a religion she didn’t even grow up in, every week. She always replied the same. She said calmy yet confidently, she liked being a part of the welcoming community.

It is only now, 10 years later, that I reflect on this conversation with my mum and understand what she means. To my younger self, church was boring. You had to sit quietly and just listen to an old man speak about why I should be good and if I am bad it wouldn’t matter, I would be forgiven with a couple Hail Mary’s (or at the time it was Hail Troy Bolton’s as he was my saving saint).

However now, I am so grateful I was put through the experience of going to a Catholic primary and high school. Although I hated religion in school and we all sounded like a cult when we recited the same prayer, at the same time every morning, I am grateful. And even though after my 13 years of being in Catholic education I still don’t necessarily follow their beliefs strongly, it set me up with valuable moral beliefs and helped me discover what I believe in today, as a young adult.

I do not believe in the disgusting, assault and misogynistic aspects of the church. Yet I believe in the teachings of being compassionate, having gratitude for everything I have, and giving back to the community. I believe in the universe and that if I put the energy I want reciprocated ‘out there’ - I will receive it. I also believe that everything happens for a reason. Which when I was reflecting on this, I realised this belief sounded similar to the Catholic teaching that everything is apart of God’s plan. Proving my point that my Catholic upbringing has shaped my beliefs today which stems from the coterie that raised me including my parents, family and the Catholic community I grew up around.

Although my schooling has structured my morals, I regard the truth to be that it doesn’t matter your religion/ what you believe in, you can always have hope and believe in your personal values. After reflecting on the conversation, I had with mum 10 years ago, I recently asked her why she chose the little Catholic primary school that she did. She replied with, she wanted to send my sister and I to an eclectic school and surround our family with like-minded children and parents that have similar values. It didn’t matter to her if they were Catholic or not.

And that makes me truly believe not in a God, or in a religion specifically but in people. By people coming together and creating a sensible, welcoming community, the universe will be a good place with lots of karaoke.

That's my ramble.

Ruby x