The concept of growing up and moving on

In recent weeks I have come across a concept of growing up that isn’t explicitly spoken about. It isn’t written out in the big book of girl stuff you use to read when you were 12 and it is hardly even addressed through conversation. It is a concept that just naturally happens and is a part of growing up and moving on. The perfect way to describe it, is by using the words from the legendary tune by Gotye, “now you’re just somebody that I use to know”.

Recently at the shops, I ran into my ex-boyfriend for the first time since we broke up. We didn’t converse, just awkwardly waved and pulled an uncomfortable smile at one another. At the time it didn’t bother me seeing him and just waving from afar, knowing we had both moved on and I didn’t want to have an awkward small chat with him anyways. However, reflecting on the interaction and how it made me feel, (because I am the biggest overthinker known to man) I realized it had made me feel a little sad. It wasn’t seeing him that made me feel dejection, it was the concept that I went from loving him to having nothing to do with him. I went from spending so much time with him, to acting like I knew nothing about him. He went from being my best friend, to a complete stranger. He truly is, just somebody that I use to know.

Having this epiphany that our once close relationship is truly gone, I realized this truly is a concept of life never explicitly spoken about. We are just expected to experience the loss of being so close to someone to becoming true strangers with them. It isn’t only seen within ex- partners. It can be experienced within friendships too. Leaving school and not talking or hearing about your friend’s life gossip just because you drifted apart. Growing up and drifting away from your childhood friend. Or just naturally changing and realizing your once close friend is naturally changing differently too.

In times to come, if you experience something similar, it is normal and a normal thing to feel emotional about. People naturally drift apart because people just naturally grow up and change and that is okay. As for old romantic relationships becoming so different from what they were, I learnt, they couldn’t be the same from what they once were anyways. Otherwise the dynamic would feel no different from when we were together and that wouldn’t allow either of us to move on and grow. I also learnt that Gotye is a musical legend who not only creates great music but create music with wise words.

That’s my ramble.

Ruby x