I have been watching Sex and the City and I have some things to say!
I have noticed an issue with the popular show that most middle-aged women call their safety blanket. And I guess, maybe the issues I see just represents our improvements to society. To make it more woke. But I can’t sit here and not call out the reasons why Sex and the City doesn’t actually make me feel empowered to be a woman.
I understand for its time, it was something different for television. It didn’t portray the perfect American, white picket fence woman. It depicted middle aged single woman in New York that had an extremely unrealistic bank account. Every meal eaten out, a cocktail drunk with every meal and a pair of Jimmy Choo’s and Christian Louboutin’s worn while eating every meal. I guess that’s Hollywood…
I also appreciate how it discusses realistic issues about men. From them just not being emotionally available to their strange fetishes. It makes the abnormal, taboo topics feel normal. And that’s probably one of the reasons it became so successful.
Okay, are you ready? Feminist Ruby coming…
Though the show doesn’t depict the Hollywood picket fence woman. All the women besides Samantha are obsessed with the idea to find the ONE. They don’t embrace their “I am woman hear me roar”. They are constantly going back to horrible men that treat them badly *cough* um Mr Big *cough* and can’t live a second embracing their singlness. It is like they are dependable and not strong independent women.
Harpers Bazarr published an article that described the show as, “the first to say that you don’t need to settle down and marry the first man you meet after your 30th birthday”. However, to me, they hate the idea that they didn’t marry at 30 years old and the whole show is actually just them trying to fill this void. Yes, they have SOME decent respect for themselves that they didn’t marry the first guy they picked up on the streets but for most of the show, they sure as hell can’t go a second without trying to find the right guy.
I mean if Carrie could’ve, she would’ve been married to Mr Big as soon as possible but he was an asshole, and she still chased him down. Really, just proving my point that she would rather chase shitty men than be single.
And some may say, “Ruby, you are just a prude, this is them embracing their singlness!” I disagree. I don’t think they embrace their sexuality by sleeping around because they don’t do it with empowering intent. Most of the show, they are dating and sleeping with men as an attempt to find the one and be in a long-term relationship. It is pretty rare for them to date a man as a fling or as a casual hook up.
In a time where shows with a little more feminism are normalised, I just don’t think the show aged well. As much as I do like Sex and the City (surprising after reading that rant, I know), if I’m going to watch a show that embraces and depicts strong women, I’m watching something like ‘Grace and Frankie’ or ‘Gilmore Girls’.
Grace and Frankie because, it illustrates women selling sex toys at 70 years old and Gilmore Girls because what is stronger than a young, single mother moving out of home at 16 years old to raise a child, get a new job and pay off her house?
That’s my ramble (and rant).
Ruby x
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